Kris Lucas: Why can't I do the things I want to do? There is so much I know I'm capable of that I never actually do. Why is that?
Arlen Faber: The trick is to realize that you're always doing what you want to do...always. Nobody is making you do anything. Once you get that, you see that you're free and that life is really just a series of choices. Nothing happens to you. You choose.
~The Answer Man (2009)
After graduating from a mildly prestigious high school and receiving a degree from a decent University, I moved home, jobless. With a degree in Accounting, my father decided it would be best for me to work at his accountant's office. Looking back, I was not ready to work full time or mature enough to handle the 9-5 lifestyle. Therefore, it turned out to be a horrible experience. I dreaded waking up in the morning and dragging myself to work only to input data. I didn't work hard or try my hardest. When I finally decided to make the best of a bad situation, I was too paranoid to accomplish anything. So here I am three years later, living at home, working at my dad's office still unaware of what I want to do with my life; still unaware of who I am.
When I heard the quote above, I thought,"That's exactly how I feel." I also believe there is a truth in the response given. I chose to not grab the opportunity in front of me, but rather complain about the surroundings as though I was better. I chose to look at what I wanted as unattainable and then make excuses for how it is not deemed an appropriate profession. Those were my choices.
I sit here now wondering how time passed me by. How am I quickly approaching thirty with no career in sight? How am I not the person I thought I would be? After months of wallowing (as I often tend to do) I realized all I needed was a goal. When I set my goal it felt unreachable in the near future. I didn't want to lower my goal because that felt as though it was unattainable and nothing is unattainable. It just wasn't right for more immediate change in my life.
So now I have to set daily goals. If I manage to achieve the goals set for the day, then it can be deemed a good day. An accomplished day. The way I see it, eventually the goals will become more complex and I will actually be living up to my potential. Till then I'm just taking life one day at a time.
